I stood outside tonight, feeling the breeze on my face. The sky was dark and peaceful. I could hear the chimes singing in the air from Moms front porch. I could see Zane in the house froze to his computer. The cars quietly passing by. As I was soaking all this in I felt at peace. All the world was right.
       After my hospital stay a month ago I knew that I had to make some changes in my life. Eating healthy and exercise was a no brainer for me. But I knew I needed to change the way I thought, how I interacted with others, and how I treated myself, mentally. Kind of change my inner dialog. I noticed that I had been upset about something or other, or fighting about something for a long long time. I let what I thought others were thinking about me affect who I was.
      I decided that I did not need to change my core beliefs. I just needed to change how I acted upon them. I am still a non believer in any god. But I dont need the stress of fighting about it anymore. I just smile at all the , god loves you's and I'll pray for you's and go on, knowing that the folks who tell me this really mean well.
      I try my very hardest to be upbeat and chipper. Try to stay focused on my goals. Try to stay positive. Speaking of goals, I have some now. I believe that working toward something is key in a happy and fulfilling life. I have weight loss and exercise goals for every day.
      Will write more on this subject later. Got to go tend to Zane